Unproductive tension is always a villain. Unproductive tension is when the mind starts on a path where one thought leads to another, and another and another and agitation begins to build. It is like a space between an event or situation where you can make a mountain out of a mole hill. The solution was to notice what was happening and stop the momentum of the thoughts that I was creating all in my head.
Way.ca.tion: A rest for the mind; an unconventional method of escaping the moment and returning refreshed and better than before.
Monday, December 8, 2014
Using My Own Skill Base
I’m on an extra tight schedule like everyone else at this time of year. I have a couple of parties to give in the next few days and I have to fit in a lot of extra task above and beyond my already full life. The carpet cleaners were late and it was clear by his voice over the phone he would rather be having lunch than picking up carpets. It was pretty easy to detect that I too was a little irritated.
With my hand on the door knob turning to admit the carpet cleansers and a vision of ghost of arguments past, I knew where this could go if I were to sprew my frustrations. I consciously choose another way of being. I decided to change my energy. The fact of the matter is I know that everything that has to get done will get done and all will be well. Even with a glich I can manage that too. Because I always have.
Stress is not always a reaction to a specific situation. Most often it is our thoughts that lead to intense feelings of stress. For awhile I was caught up in my thinking about all the things I had to do and the lateness of the carpet cleaners. As I waited for the carpet cleaners I found myself in a place of unproductive tension.
I had to create other thoughts and assurances that would serve me. I conciously had to turn the unproductive tention into usable energy. I had to remind myself that I have a choice of how I can feel. Instead of telling myself how terrible all of this was going and getting frustrated I reminded myself that 'everything is going to be fine in the end"!
And it was.
Watch your thoughts. Catch yourself when you are being negative. If you're already under time contraints and the time is counting down you'll do far better to the finish managing your thoughts and attitutde.
Anger Management Institute, LLC Specializing in impulse control and people skills.