Keep An Anger Log

When we look at a situation that make us angry, it is common to blame the situation and other people for our anger.  We tend to think that what someone else did is the cause of our anger and inappropriate responses. Contrary to this belief other people or situations are NOT what makes us act inappropriately.  What really makes us angry is our is thinking angrily about the things that happen to us.  Whatever we think or tell ourselves about an event makes us angry.  NOT THE EVENT.

One tool I use with some clients is to keep an anger log.  Whenever you are aware of feeling angry is when you should write in your log.  You can write in your Anger Log immediately after the episode occurs or at the end of the day when you have had more time to reflect. 

One purpose of keeping an Anger Log is that you will begin to be more aware of the triggering thoughts and consequences of your anger. 

Don't get a pretty book to use as an Anger Log just get a composition or inexpensive notebook.  Really nice journals often make us think that we should be smart or write flowing sentences that are grammatically correct.  This Anger Log is for you alone.  Just write.

Keep your log simple and follow these steps each time:

Situation: Describe the situation about which you have become angry.

1. Beliefs - What did you tell yourself about a situation.

2  Feelings - Describe how you felt

3. Actions - Describe what you did.

4. Dispute - If your thinking is what caused the anger, modify your thought process. In other words what is another prospective to stand in around the event. 

Got Anger?  Call the Anger Management Institute, LLC @ 510.393.0250

Taking a Time Out

There are a few different references as to who coined the concept of "time out".  The story that resonates for me is that a psychologist invented "time out" as a means to gather oneself and or re-center.  Over time "time-out" became a negative and a punishment.

 When angry or stressed  "time-out" is a great tool.  The technique of "time out" or to "gather oneself" works almost immediately.  Along with helping deescalate a situation it is an important tool in dis-engaging so that you don't say or do something that is damaging.  

"Time-Out provides an opportunity to think through what is happening.  Once removed from the situation it is possible to consider other ways to solve an issue in a manner that is not violent in words or actions.  "Time Out" doesn't mean walk away from the situation.   It means to disengage and then reengage later.  If you decide to leave for some amount of time say, twenty minutes to an hour honor your word and comeback when promised. That will help build trust.  When sufficiently cooled down then reengage however just know if things start to escalate "Time-Out again.  Sometimes it takes a few attempts to solve an issue.  A "Time-Out" is a much better choice than saying something that may live in the mind of your loved one, colleague or peer long after the disagreement has passed.

If anger is an issue and is affecting workplace or personal relationships then anger management or Emotional Intelligence Coaching is the solution.  Anger is a very solvable issue.  You only have to want to do the work. 

Anger Management Institute, LLC 510.393.0250

Coaching for Emotional Intelligence/Impulse Control

Civility Training for Attorneys, Executive Coaching for Emotional Intelligence has come a long way in making an intervention for anger management acceptable if not a new sign of status.

The range of people professionally and personally seeking Civility Training, Anger Management and Emotional Intelligence Training includes everyone from sports figures, the Hollywood elite as well as discrete politicians. The increase in people quietly seeking Emotional Intelligence Coaching for Impulse Control/Anger Management has risen exponentially in the last few years. Since Emotional Intelligence Coaching does not have any stigmas attached, it has no negatives. High profile clients who may consider counseling or psychotherapy or even anger
management as negative is more open to Emotional Intelligence Coaching.

 Coaching for self-control consists of the Bar-On EQi Emotional Intelligence Assessment, The Practice of Control client workbook, DVDs as well as the popular Contrasting Wheels of Behavior.

Coaching can be scheduled live and via phone.
For more information on Civility Training, Anger Management and Emotional Intelligence Training for your small or large business, line staff and/or management, or to improve your personal or professional relationships please call the Anger Management Institute, @ 510.393.0250

Amazon's Good Customer Service Creates A Win For The Customer

Customer service representatives are the front lines of a company's bottom line.  Having had a nice handful, recently, of positive experiences with Amazon’s customer service department, I would say they know something that many major corporations today do not.    It could be personal growth training's and/or solid salaries for the frontline service reps.  Whatever it is it works.  I'm sold on working with Amazon!   

 The magic of a healthy, well-treated, well-trained customer service person trickles down to the customer experience and makes for a win-win interchange.  Happy customer makes for a happy bottom line.

 Your small or large business can benefit from ongoing group civility and emotional intelligence training.  Training's for the frontlines and management is like pushing the refresh button of your most valuable resource and improving the bottom-line. 

Behavior In The Workplace

 A client was recently referred to me by a company who really recognized the value of this employee.  The employee is highly productive however his workplace behavior was continually disruptive.  This employee's behavior affected the team members which in turn often affected other units within the company.  Behavior in the workplace IS part of the job.  

 Behavior should not be considered separate from the performance of task in the work environment.

  Clients such as the person sent to me respond well to civility training in a relatively short time.  Change can be realized in as little as 5 weeks.  The Anger Management Institute provides training for individuals as well as small groups.

If you have employee's whose behavior is affecting the workplace environment please call the Anger Management Institute.  The Anger Management Institute is an evidence based program with both a pre and post assessment.

Anger Management Institute, LLC 510.393.0250